Tofuism

This week finally saw winter break... By which I mean that we had a couple of nice days for some long rides. And the air conditioning came on in my house. This NEVER would have happened had I been home. But sometimes, when roommates are left to themselves, things happen differently. He closed the windows, and put on the air. For the record, it did hit 83. But, it is March.
The other day, I put in a little 57 miler over some of the rolling hills to the west. The day did not go as the weatherman planned. It was colder and cloudier than thought. But the sun finally came out. And I took this picture.



Now, I digress. I need to get something off my chest. I went to the store with someone very dear to me, we will not use her name, we will only call her... "mom." I got this person, "mom," to buy tofu. It is lent, that means vegetarian Fridays, etc. But, whatever the reason, it is an awful thing to trick someone into buying tofu to cook it for them, and then leave without touching said tofu. So, this "mom" has a block of tofu. What can be done? Change the water on a regular basis. And...

Salad...


Spinach
Tofu, cut into small 1cm cubes
Citrus (I'm using blood oranges. There are other options like kumquats)
Dressing (oil and vinegar, soy sauce, Ginger, carrots, pepper, and I added some capers). Honestly, it looked better than it tasted.

Stir fry...



Rice in the rice cooker
Tofu, chopped up into 1cm
Spinach or bok Choy
Olive oil
Onions
Carrots
Garlic
Brown sugar... No sugar so I used molasses and a handful of raisins
Chili pepper
Soy or fish sauce.... I had no soy. Mine was fishy, and good.
Vinegar
Almond butter (or peanut butter)... Ah, I skipped that.
Mix the almond butter straight into the rice. Yes, I did skip this, but I also highly recommend it. Then, heat the olive oil and throw the onions and carrots in. Once they have begun to cook, add the garlic and keep the heat low. then mix in the greens (spinach or bok choy) and tofu. Once it begins to wilt, add a small amount of brown sugar, and some vinegar and chili.

Curried Tofu carbonara


Rice noodles (cooking)
Egg
Cilantro
Chopped tofu
Oil
Onion
Garlic
Curry paste
Salt and pepper
Chili pepper
Sauté the onions and garlic and add about a tsp of curry paste. Stir that all together add tofu and a little pasta water.
In a seperate bowl, crack an egg and then add the hot, cooked pasta fresh off the stove and stir. Add the oil and curry paste mixture and continue stirring. Add about 2T of chopped cilantro and some chili powder.
Don't be afraid to add some almond or peanut butter or just nuts.

And, of course, to care for your tofu. Once the package is open, it will go bad very quickly unless you change the water daily, or almost daily.
For a different flavor, change the water with a marinade. Any marinade.

Cubism

I went and saw a Picasso exhibit. Amazing. His artwork harkens back to a childlike view of the world. Those strange paintings that look like a 4 year old drew them, well, that's what he was going for. They were not without the adult elements and the brushstrokes of a master, but his paintings really do look at the world in a different way.
Let me digress... And explain. Have you ever had a young child explain a picture he drew of, say, his father? If you ask who it is in the picture he will look at you like you just asked the most obvious question and tell you it's his dad. Then he'll tell you why. Maybe it's a look on the face or a curl in the hair or a way of holding his hands, or something. Something that the child has picked up that is truly insightful and tells us that this kid knows what he is talking about.
That is what Picasso tried to do. I also saw some Degas, Renoir, Sargeant, and the Rockefeller Bedroom. But no picture Spoke to me quite like this one:


Then, of course, we dined. We started off with an appetizer of sweet potato in a goat cheese sauce. Then, in honor of St. joseph's feast day we had the most amazing hott cross buns (to the tune of three blind mice) and prosecco on rooftop.

That was when I got busy making a Coffee and Chili Rubbed Pork Loin with Parsnip Puree with Asparagus Pesto.


First off, the parsnip puree. Boil the parsnips in salty water until they are done (took about 10 minutes). Then, add salt and pepper and puree. I added parsnip water to get the right consistency and to help the blender. That was it. Part mashed potato, part carrot... Really, really good and amazingly delicious.

The Pork Loin
Rub with a mix of:
2T coffee fresh grounds plus another 2T of used coffee grounds
2T whole grain mustard
1T chili powder
1.5t unsweetened cocoa powder
1t coriander
2 medium cloves of garlic
Cayenne and salt to taste
mash that into a paste and rub the pork and then allow the pork to sit. I used the hott cross buns and bottle of prosecco method to time that. Once the prosecco is done, heat up a cast iron pan with some olive oil and sear the pork loin for 3 minutes per side. Then take the whole pan and put it into a 375 oven for 25 minutes or until the pork reaches the proper temperature. I also periodically added some parsnip water and about 1/4 C of red wine to keep it moist.

The drippings were nothing short of incredible. Do not waste them. And this was, of course, rounded out with a little gluten free bread courtesy of... You guessed it: her.

Sushiism souf of da bordah

First off, SAFETY FIRST.


IN CASE OF FIRE, DO NOT USE THE FIRE ALARM.
I just came off a whirlwind vacation. Which means I haven't slept much. What did do was spend the first half of my week missing my bike... And the second half of the week riding. I purchased some new bike parts: a saddle and a cycling computer with an altimeter. I'm an altimeter junkie. I love those things and I don't quite know why. So, I was carrying those things around without my bike.
Until yesterday. I was finally reunited with my bike. I, of course, was elated and put on the new computer with altimeter (I registered a 9% grade today, that's hott). I refrained from reseating my bike as I was about to embark on an epic 110 mile ride. I should have. A long ride is a good way to break in a saddle, and my previous saddle, despite its roughly 5000 miles of breaking in, could not have been more uncomfortable... Just an aside, if you lose weight, be prepared for an entirely different experience of sitting.
Which brings me to the Mexican Sushi. For some reason, people are narrow minded about everything. Sushi is NOT Mexican. The very concept requires some mental flexibility. So, why, after explaining what was in this dish did I get I have this discussion:
"So, what kind of Fish did you use."
"I didn't use any fish."
"but it's sushi."
"Yeah, kind of."
"And sushi has fish."
Ah, first of all, no, not necessarily. Second of all, sushi is not Mexican. Not even remotely. The paradigm is already way, way off.

MEXICAN SUSHI (without fish, but you could add some if you want)


1 onion
1 green pepper
1 portabella cap
Season with Cumin, Chili, oregano, salt and pepper the sauté with oil and finish it with a balsamic reduction.
1 C jasmine/sushi rice... Cooked
1 avocado, sliced
Cilantro, chopped
Cheese, shredded
Chili sauce
Egg beaten and placed in bowl
Oil in a pan cause your frying
Corn Tortillas

Cook the rice and let it cool so you can stick your hand in it. Warm the tortillas in a damp towel so they are pliable. Then, spread a small amount of rice over the tortilla, put in some of the mushroom and pepper mix and a little bit avacado (when you roll them, they hold less than you think). Roll them up, and stick 2 toothpicks near the center. Then slice it in half between the toothpicks. Stick the cut ends in the egg for a few seconds the place it cut end down in the hot, hot oil. Give it a minute and pull it out. Sprinkle it with cheese, cilantro, and chili sauce.

Secret of Life Chili

Yes, I have discovered the meaning of life. I really wish I could tell you, but you are not ready for that kind of spiritual awakening. But, have no fear. When you are ready, that knowledge will literally fall into your lap... Unless you are standing, in which case the secret of life will fall to the floor and your destiny will remain unfulfilled and you will probably wind up with an office job.
So how does one prepare oneself for the secret of life? Mong Beans.
True story:

In India, there was a very saintly person. Mung beans and rice with yogurt was his entire diet. He would make it each night and eat it for breakfast the next morning. That man was a radiant light, just from the food he eat. People would come from all over to be healed by this man. Each morning they would form a line outside his door. Whatever sickness they had, he would give them mung beans and rice with yogurt. And they would be cured! That's why it is called the food of the angels. It has protein, carbohydrates, everything you need.

You can easily check up on the specifics, or you can just look it up Here. The good news is that you can do this and still drink Yogi Tea. All other tea brands will disturb your Qi. The plural of which, and this is important, is NOT "Qis" but it is, in fact, cheese.
I must admit that I accidentally stumbled on the secret of life in the grocery store. I have a pressure cooker which opens the world of dry beans. Whereas, it used to take a fortnight to prepare dried kidney beans, I can now do that in a half hour. So, dried beans are back, baby! And I went a little crazy. I branched out to mong beans and adzuki beans, and consequently have achieved total consciousness. Something that would not have been possible with a jar of Goya Cuban Style Black Beans.
And what did I do with my newly achieved total consciousness? I made chili (something that would have been possible with Goya Cuban Style Black Beans).



Secret of Life Chili
1/2 C mong beans
1/2 C adzuki beans .... Soaked then cooked in the pressure cooker
1 onion
1.5 T olive oil
2 Jalapeno ................. Sauté then add
2 cloves of garlic
The cooked beans
1 C diced tomatoes
1 C water
1/2 C chopped parsley
chili powder, paprika, cayenne, and cumin, salt and pepper

Cook for 30 more minutes and serve over rice and under cheese.

Top side downism

Upside down pizza is, ahem, my own creation. I've decided that I will
make this. And so, to stay true to my resolution, and to not forget what I intend to do, I have preblogged it. This is what long hours of studying and thinking about cycling can do (namely, predispose one to intense and welcome distractibility)... I have been debating the merits of a long slow ride or a shorter slow ride tomorrow. I fully intend to ride slowly. It doesn't usually happen.
What usually happens is that I hit a certain point in a slow ride, let's call it "a hill," and push up my tempo. Then, I become mildly annoyed at how out of breathe I am and I start telling myself, "No, you gotta be able to ride up that hill and keep it going.". And next thing I know I am back at my door after having averaged 20.8 mph for the last hour. I consider that a fast ride. Slow rides are not my forte. So, with that in the background, I have to debate what to eat post ride (to replace the nearly 1000 calories an hour that that pace can burn up)... But I digress (and often).

Layer 1, a melange of toppings. This will begin with something, anything really, sauteed in some olive oil and then mixed with cheese. I'm thinkining a gruyere cheese with bits of thick bacon or thin ham, and onions, peppers and garlic.
So it was 2 pieces of beef bacon, 1 onion, 4 small bell peppers, and 2 cloves of garlic with emmentaler cheese.

Layer 2, sauce. Sauce or sliced tomatoes with a bit of salt and seasonings? I'm thinking the latter...
Wound up being a light tomato sauce more mixed in than layered.

....I think I may go out with my tri-aero bars for a quick and very fast spin tomorrow followed by a long ride on Sunday...

Layer 3, crust. I am gluten free. Not entirely in a gluten will kill me way, but in an I avoid it like cleaning the bathroom way (sometimes necessary, sometimes desirable, but never an ideal use of my time). So, with that in mind, I think I will take some soaked polenta and layer it over the top to form an even crust. I may even stir in an egg so it becomes more of a crust. I will spray oil on the top so it glistens and marginally fries under the hot food warmer lights. Then I will bake it on HOT until it is cooked. Then, i will sprinkle it with Parmesan. Then I will enjoy.
Polenta with some grated Parmesan on top. No egg.

Out of the oven it was delicious, but a bit watery. I sort of expected it to set more as it cooked. In retrospect, I might try that egg in it next time, and I will thicken the polenta (that is, use more of it).


1 onion
Peppers (I used 4 small bell peppers, but one large should work well too)
2 T olive oil.................................... Mix and sauté in a cast iron pan
2 cloves of garlic
2 prices of beef bacon.................. Add to peppers and onions on stove
4 oz cheese.................................. Mix in over heat until melty
Tomato sauce............................... Layered over the cheese and sauteed veg
1/2 C Polenta with salt and pepper, not quite fully cooked






Layer the polenta on top and sprinkle with Parmesan. The polenta is not fully cooked yet so it is more watery and easier to layer. Then throw it in the oven at 350 for 20 minutes. Take it out, let it set for 5-10 minutes and serve.

Marmalade and other movements

I decided to make marmalade. It seemed only fitting as it was supposed to go inside a cupcake. I was not about to make the cupcakes, that would involve using measuring cups, but I still felt I should do my part. I found a willing participant who would gladly make cupcakes. My girlfriend is a "stress baker." What this means is that her primary coping mechanism is to bake cookies or, in what has become her new nodus operandi, cupcakes. You can see all the delicious results of her stressful days on here. I really try not to stress her out just for the cookies, but sometimes, I must admit, I do give into temptation.
To assuage my guilt, I try to cook for her. Real food. Manly food. Not especially manly food, because I don't like to grill. My last grilling experience... The grill caught on fire. I was making hamburgers. Little balls of ground beef. Not gourmet, just simple hamburgers. Easy, delicious, what could go wrong? The grill could catch on fire. I know, it's a grill. The fire is how you cook things. That turned into a massive grease fire right under my burgers. Those burgers, they turned into something between a hockey puck and a racquetball.
So, since it does not involve being angered near a grill, I made marmalade. I scoured the Internet for nearly 7 minutes to find the perfect recipe. Most of the recipes read like this: 14 pounds of oranges, 37 pounds of sugar, a home commercial cannery, and a dromedary camel. Not having a camel, only a few oranges, and no desire for a post apocalyptic store of orange marmalade, I nearly gave up the whole project. Ultimately, I four a recipe that made only one, normal sized jar. I read it, took some ideas and then made my own recipe. So here is what I did.

1.5 oranges... I ate half of that second orange, but i probably shoud've used it. I did put the peel into the concoction. I actually used a blood orange and half a regular orange because I was going for a slightly different flavor.
1 lime. This is keeping with that "slighty different flavor."
1/4 C sugar. This is not particularly sweet. Add more sugar if you prefer.
1/4 C water.

Wash the oranges and lime, then slice them thin with the peel on. I then threw them into a food processor and hit pulse a few times to make them smaller. With mixed results.











Throw everything into an appropriately sized saucepan and let it boil. Your goal here is to boil the water, dissolve the sugar and start softening this oranges. Let that go about 10 minutes, then turn it down to simmer for the next half hour. Remove the pan from the heat and read a good book. After waiting until your marmalade has made progress on its way to cooling or you have made sufficient progress toward total consciousness, place your marmalade into 1 appropriately sized jar.
Unless you are planning on stockpiling marmalade in case the whole Y2K thing finally catches up to us, you don't need to do any ridiculous canning process. Just throw it in the fridge until you are ready to make cupcakes.

Pancakerianism

Pancakes. Yes, that is a complete sentence. The recipe follows, and with a little maple syrup, you will see that this is nearly a full paragraph.
I am currently sitting in a review of the colon. This is the culmination of a 1.5 years and about a half million dollars of medical education: the colon. I can now respond to any medical emergency or serious disease or minor discomfort with a crinkled brow and a far off thoughtful look. I may even say, "that's interesting."
Tutu
So, start your day with breakfast. And, depending on how far you are planning on riding, fuel up with more, or less...



1/2 C Oats
1/2 C almond flour
1/2 C Buckwheat Flour
1/2 C Millet Flour
2 eggs
1/2 tsp baking soda
1 chopped apple
1 T of molasses
.... Mix all this together and then sprinkle the top with cinnamon
Meanwhile, take a pad of butter and melt it in A frying pan then pour it over the pancake batter. When it hits the cinnamon it will release the most amazing aroma. Mix it all together.
Then take that very same buttery frying pan and use it to cook your pancakes.
With a little maple syrup, they are the most worthwhile thing you can do in the morning without soap.